Unicorn Roots

Holistic help for the disabled community

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  • Silver Linings — Mobility & Transportation

    Silver Linings — Mobility & Transportation

    Waymo

    Transportation can be one of the most challenging obstacles for those of us with disabilities, though it can be adapted to accommodate many disabilities. Lights and visual alerts can help Deaf drivers respond to cues that hearing drivers respond to instinctively. Pedal extensions and hand controls can help drivers with significant height differences and mobility disabilities. But these adaptations often don’t address the needs of those with less visible and invisible disabilities. Blind and visually impaired people often rely on public transportation and assistance from others to get around. People with epilepsy, narcolepsy, psychiatric disabilities, and other similar conditions frequently have to rely on outside help entirely. Fortunately, my ASD and the type of epilepsy I have don’t prevent me from holding a driver’s license. But I live in San Francisco, and navigating the city with a service dog comes with its own set of challenges. That’s where ride-shares have helped, for the most part.

    What able-bodyminded people often forget about are the smaller, everyday challenges that people with disabilities face. Some ride-share drivers see a service dog and refuse the ride outright. Others are cold and dismissive. Social media is littered with stories of blind ride-share users who walk to a waiting Lyft or Uber only to find that the driver has already left, or they’re told that the driver doesn’t take dogs. I personally have been told more than once that I don’t look blind and that people fake it all the time. While service dog fraud is certainly a real problem, the law requires reasonable accommodations, and that doesn’t change based on how someone looks.

    Waymo doesn’t have any of these problems. The app allows users to set accessibility preferences that take effect the moment a ride is ordered. Wheelchair accessible cars are available, but the accessibility customization options go much further than that. Need the car to announce itself and tell you where the door is? Done. Need the doors to unlock automatically? Done. Need the number of in-car announcements adjusted? Done. Need extra legroom for a service dog? Done. Need a specific temperature and airflow? Done. Users can also connect directly to Spotify, YouTube Music, and iHeart and adjust the audio settings from their smartphone. To make things even easier, as long as a service dog is well-behaved, there’s no need to let Waymo know in advance.

    Of course I did my research before writing this, and part of that research involved testing things out for myself. My first Waymo ride came as a surprise treat after my mom took me to a stand-up show at the Castro Theater in April 2026. Initially, I thought what a lot of people probably think. “No driver? Robots and AI?” But I was pleasantly surprised. I still think about the broader questions surrounding driverless car safety. But in a world where people routinely forget to look up from their phones, neglect to look both ways when crossing the street, and where road rage is almost a given, a car that is always watching and adjusting to my needs before I even open the door feels like a blessing.

    So what’s the downside? Initially, I wondered whether Waymo was somehow listening or watching me. But when I got into the car, the system addressed this right away, walking me through everything I needed to know and confirming that its two onboard microphones were not active during the ride. It even told me that I could “sing to my heart’s content.” This immediately gave me confidence. As any neurodivergent person knows, stims and tics can be a significant obstacle in public spaces. But that isn’t an issue in a Waymo car. The other obvious concern is cost, which will vary depending on demand, locations, time of day, and travel distance. That said, the most expensive Waymo ride that I could find in San Francisco was comparable to standard ride-share prices. In fact, my two rides between the Castro and the Kaiser Medical Center campus came to less than $30 in total. All in all, I’m impressed.

    Resources 

    Waymo LLC (2026). Our Mission: Be The World’s Most Trusted Driver. Waymo. https://waymo.com/about/

  • Sexuality, Gender Identity, and Disability, Part 5

    Sexuality, Gender Identity, and Disability, Part 5

    Healthcare & Legislation

    Allopathic healthcare (Western medicine) and the complicated maze of legislation surrounding it can be extremely frustrating. For members of other minority communities, these frustrations only intensify. Disabled women, especially women of color, are often seen as unfit and dependent, leading to even more differential treatment and unequal access to resources. Because of this, they are also half as likely to be employed as men with disabilities, and limited accessibility early in life perpetuates the negative cycle (Slayter & Johnson, 2023).

    Disabled women of color often start with decreased access to training and resources, entering into a job market that already discriminates against them. But this doesn’t just affect women. Disabled men frequently have their masculinity challenged in the workplace, while disabled transgender people tend to experience even higher levels of unemployment and underemployment than their cisgender counterparts. In 2015, 24% of transgender people in the US were unemployed, 45% were living in poverty, and 29% of disabled transgender people were seeking or receiving government benefits such as SNAP and WIC. Still, ableism is often overlooked as a contributor to inequality in research, even in studies that look at disability issues (Slayter & Johnson, 2023). And where employment challenges exist, housing and healthcare challenges follow.

    The 2015 US Transgender Survey (USTS) documented more than 27,000 cases of disabled transgender respondents receiving limited access to affordable and inclusive healthcare. Some respondents reported withholding disability information or actively choosing not to disclose their LGBTQ+ identity due to past discrimination or fear of altered treatment, fears that are unfortunately well-founded. Disabled transgender people were also found to be twice as likely as their non-disabled counterparts to report mental health issues affecting their daily lives, six times more likely to have difficulty with concentration, memory, and/or decision-making, and four times as likely to have difficulty running errands alone (Slayter & Johnson, 2023).

    LGBTQ+ people with intellectual or developmental disabilities (IDDs) face a particularly distinct form of discrimination: their LGBTQ+ identity is often misread as behavioral issues, even by well-meaning medical professionals. This is likely due to a lack of literature and education on the intersection of IDDs and LGBTQ+ identities, a gap that is likely due in part to difficulties involved in recruiting and supporting LGBTQ+ people with IDDs in research settings (Slayter & Johnson, 2023). However, the subtle discrimination and unconscious biases don’t end there.

    On top of this, disabled parenting presents its own set of challenges. C-sections and labor inductions occur more frequently in those with disabilities, even when there’s no medical need. After birth, inaccessible buildings, enadequate equipment, insufficient policies, and limited quality interpreter services further create more barriers. Some disabled people are actively discouraged from having children based on unfounded assumptions that their disability will be inherited or that others will have to raise the child for them. Women with IDDs have even been forced or coerced into being sterilized without legal ramifications, a practice that is disproportionately common among disabled Black women (Slayter & Johnson, 2023).

    Statistically, 41% of disabled Black women and 28% of disabled white women have used sterilization as a form of contraception. Disabled women have also frequently been excluded from both women’s rights and disability rights movements, overlooked because of the combined minority identities. Historically seen as weaker and more vulnerable, disabled women have been excluded from these movements. Though occasionally, disabled women have been included primarily for the optics (Slayter & Johnson, 2023).

    Then there’s the legal side of things. Public schools are required to protect disabled students under federal laws like Section 504 of the Rehabilitation Act, while Title IX protects students and staff from discrimination based on sex. When these laws conflict in real-world cases involving students with multiple minority identities, the results can be especially challenging to navigate. Social movements like #MeToo have helped to improve Title IX enforcement. Still, without proper education on the applicability of these laws in real-world disability cases, some may not understand when something’s wrong, let alone what the true consequences are. Meanwhile, mental health diagnoses continue to increase while legislation remains largely unchanged, and disabled people continue to be significantly more likely to be sexually assaulted than their peers (Slayter & Johnson, 2023).

    What’s important to understand is that when disabilities and other identities intersect, it’s almost impossible to address one without affecting the others. A queer, disabled, Black woman can’t simply choose which part of her identity will affect her day. And that’s the main point here: disabled people shouldn’t have to pick between living comfortably and avoiding harassment (Slayter & Johnson, 2023). 

    In 2024, disabled LGBTQ+ adults in the US reported annual household incomes at least $3,000 below the average and significantly higher rates of workplace discrimination. They were also approximately two and a half times more likely to receive government unemployment benefits, and significantly more likely to receive SNAP, TANF, and EITC benefits, while being less likely to receive SSI benefits than their straight counterparts. Around 43% also reported postponing or avoiding medical care due to cost, and 31% did so because of discrimination (Doherty, Ives-Rublee, & Norris, 2025).

    Anti-LGBTQ+ legislation at both the state and federal level has also contributed to denied care in among disabled LGBTQ+ adults, including gender affirming and reproductive healthcare. Even when disabled LGBTQ+ adults did receive healthcare, they were more likely than non-disabled LGBTQ+ adults to have providers intentionally refuse to acknowledge their family or refuse to see them all together because of religious beliefs. Because of this, many feel uncomfortable discussing their sexuality, gender identity, or intersex variation with a therapist (Doherty, Ives-Rublee, & Norris, 2025).

    But we don’t simply let this happen. Data collection and policy recommendations can be powerful tools for change in our communities. The 2024 LGBTQI+ Community Survey found that 48% of all LGBTQ+ respondents, and 70% of transgender respondents, identify as having a disability. Of these, 24% are related to mental health, 14% are emotional or behavioral, and 13% are a chronic illness. LGBTQ+ people with disabilities consistently showed worse outcomes across all categories discussed compared to those with a single minority identity. In fact, 51% of the disabled LGBTQ+ respondents had experienced some form of discrimination, nearly double that of non-disabled LGBTQ+ respondents and straight disabled respondents. These statistics don’t even account for race or religion, and every environment surveyed showed elevated discrimination rates for disabled LGBTQ+ adults (Doherty, Ives-Rublee, & Norris, 2025).

    Clearly, policy change is urgently needed. This includes protecting Sexual Orientation and Gender Identity (SOGI) data that political organizations have been systematically removing, data essential for addressing health disparities in the LGBTQ+ community. It also means keeping medical decisions between patients and providers, protecting access to gender affirming care, restoring and improving SSI, restaffing and funding civil rights agencies, and protecting government agencies like the Department of Education (Doherty, Ives-Rublee, & Norris, 2025).

    In 2020, “same-sex relations” were considered a criminal offence in 69 UN countries, with 11 imposing a death penalty. Luckily, since the 1980s, social acceptance of LGBTQ+ identities has increased in 56 of the 175 English-speaking countries reviewed for the Green et al. study. A country’s healthcare system also plays a significant role. Programs like Medicare and Medicaid offer some support in the US, but outcomes can vary considerably between countries with universal healthcare and those with privatized healthcare, like the US. Clearly, the LGBTQ+ and disability communities each have their own stigmas and discrimination, making those at the intersection a minority within a minority (Green et al., 2023).

    Despite legislation being passed to prevent open discrimination, it’s clear that LGBTQ+ and disabled people are still facing it in many forms. Disabled people around the world are routinely ignored, stared at, attacked, misunderstood, and underestimated. Attitudes towards the LGBTQ+ community tend to be more positive in Nordic and Western European countries. Yet, even in these countries, LGBTQ+ people with disabilities are significantly more likely to have been harassed or assaulted than their non-disabled peers, and often feel less comfortable asking for help from law enforcement, particularly in the case of disabled transgender people. Media representation also supports this. While LGBTQ+ visibility in the media has greatly improved recently, LGBTQ+ people with disabilities are still largely absent from the screen (Green et al., 2023). 

    Psychological impacts are also severe in the LGBTQ+ disabled community. Anxiety and stress rates are also higher among LGBTQ+ people with disabilities. In the Deaf community, LGBTQ+ identity has been linked to increased rates of depression, anxiety, lung disease, and arthritis. LGBTQ+ people with disabilities are also more likely to have experienced addiction and self-harm, and identifying as non-binary raises the risk of depression and anxiety by 80%. LGBTQ+ women with disabilities are also significantly more likely to be diagnosed with arthritis, asthma, COPD, lung disease, diabetes, PTSD, anxiety disorders, and substance use disorders. While this means that they are more likely to seek healthcare, they’re also less likely to have received an HIV test, a recent pap smear, or a mammogram. (Green et al., 2023).

    Legal barriers compound all this. Some local US laws actively prohibit positive discussion of LGBTQ+ relationships, South Carolina, for example, only permits the discussion of same-sex relationships in schools when talking about sexually transmitted infections (STIs) (Green et al., 2023). But change is not impossible. It starts with conversations about these problems, educating others, openly advocating for LGBTQ+ and disability communities, and proud allyship.

    References

    Doherty, C., Ives-Rublee, M., & Norris, H. (2025). The State of Disabled LGBTQI+ People in 2024. Center for American Progress. https://www.americanprogress.org/article/the-state-of-disabled-lgbtqi-people-in-2024/

    Green, A.K., Gomes, R.S.M., Heinze, N., Kempapidis, T. (2023). Queer and Disabled: Exploring the experiences of people who identify as LGBT and live with disabilities. MDPI.com. https://www.mdpi.com/2673-7272/4/1/4

    Slayter, E., & Johnson, L. (2023). Social Work Practice and Disability Communities: An intersectional anti-oppressive approach — Chapter 7. Salem State University. ROTEL Project. https://pressbooks.salemstate.edu/disabilitysocialwork/chapter/chapter-7-gender-gender-identity-and-gender-expression/

  • Sexuality, Gender Identity, and Disability, Part 4

    Sexuality, Gender Identity, and Disability, Part 4

    Society & Sexuality

    Physical barriers are just some of the challenges that the disabled LGBTQ+ community faces. As I’ve touched on in other posts, societal attitudes often desexualize and dehumanize disabled people in general. Fortunately, modified sexual education, adaptive techniques, assistive technology (yes, even in the bedroom), and inclusive healthcare can help address some of this. For specific examples and resources, check out the Disability Resources page (Disability Resources, 2026).

    One disability that often emphasizes the desexualization of those with disabilities is Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD). ASD often affects communication, behavior, and sensory processing, but it does not affect the process of sexual development. One common trait is a difficulty with social interactions, which is why people with ASD often benefit from being directly taught that sexual feelings are normal, but acting on those feelings should only take place privately and between consenting adults. Open, honest conversations about sexuality can give autistic people direct permission to explore their feelings and ask questions without fear of judgment. Teaching them to communicate clearly with their partners about boundaries, reinforcing that they deserve complete respect, will support healthy development (Haghighi, 2023).

    A 2021 study found that while people with ASD generally develop sexuality in the same way as neurotypical people, difficulties with social behavior, lower quality sexual education, ableism, desexualization, stigma, and social exclusion tend to lead to poorer knowledge of sex and privacy. Planned Parenthood recommends teaching prepubescent autistic children about puberty before developmental changes begin, teaching them about reproductive health, safe sex, and appropriate behavior. However, I would argue that this kind of thorough early education could benefit everyone, not just those on the spectrum (Haghighi, 2023).

    For autistic kids, these conversations may go more smoothly when accompanied by other activities because of the common discomfort with eye contact. Using “what if” phrasing can also accommodate the slower processing that many on the spectrum experience. For example, taking a quiet walk with your autistic preteen and asking them something like “What if your period starts at school?” can start a low-pressure conversation in a casual, comfortable way (Haghighi, 2023).

    Some people with ASD may also have difficulty distinguishing between public and private spaces or between different types of relationships, distinctions that affect what constitutes appropriate behavior. It’s equally important for autistic people and their partners to understand that healthy relationships are built on communication, trust, respect, honesty, and mutual acceptance. For many, this means establishing and maintaining clear boundaries from the very beginning (Haghighi, 2023).

    One comment I have heard more often than I’d like to admit is some variation of “how could someone with ASD even enjoy sex,” usually in reference to sensory sensitivities. It’s true, many people with ASD find the sensory nature of sex overwhelming and uncomfortable to think about. However, this does not mean that everyone on the autism spectrum is asexual. It simply means that communication and accommodation are where the real joy starts. These accommodations can be simple: tying hair back, wearing thin clothing, and creating safewords or gestures can make a significant difference (Haghighi, 2023).

    These relationships might not look traditional, but small changes can even add a sense of novelty and fun. As long as everyone involved is informed, consenting, and age-appropriate, a fulfilling relationship is very possible. Of course, we also have to consider the role of intersectionality when thinking about multiple identities, which actually has roots in black feminism (Green et al., 2023).

    The sociological concept of intersectionality illustrates how overlapping identities can create a layered sense of oppression, leaving people to feel like falling through the cracks. Research confirms that disability is more common in the LGBTQ+ community, and surveys show that LGBTQ+ people with disabilities often feel less connected to the LGBTQ+ community than their non-disabled peers. The more their activities were limited by disability, the stronger their sense of rejection. One study found that aside from HIV and breast cancer, LGBTQ+ people with disabilities often felt invisible in the LGBTQ+ community. After all, an LGBTQ+ identity is often inherently a sexual one, while disabled people are routinely desexualized. While self-acceptance of intersecting identities has been shown to benefit overall mental health, it doesn’t change how society sees LGBTQ+ people with disabilities or the inevitable discrimination we face (Green et al., 2023).

    To complicate matters further, researchers have categorized several types of overlapping societal identities. Intersectional identities are those that are fully inseparable from one another. Interactive identities mutually reinforce each other. And parallel identities draw analogies between their related natures (Green et al., 2023). Clearly, these distinctions only become more complex when psychology weighs in.

    References

    Disability Resources (2026). Sexuality and Disability: Comprehensive Guide & Resource Directory. DisabilityResources.org. https://www.disabilityresources.org/sex.html

    Haghighi, A.S. (2023). How does autism affect sexuality and sexual relationships? Medical News Today. https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/autism-and-sex

    Green, A.K., Gomes, R.S.M., Heinze, N., Kempapidis, T. (2023). Queer and Disabled: Exploring the experiences of people who identify as LGBT and live with disabilities. MDPI.com. https://www.mdpi.com/2673-7272/4/1/4

  • Sexuality, Gender Identity, and Disability, Part 3

    Sexuality, Gender Identity, and Disability, Part 3

    Society & Gender

    In Western society, disability tends to be de-gendered, creating an environment that’s generally androcentric — neither gender neutral nor genuinely gender-inclusive. According to 2019 CDC data, 25.4% of men and 28.1% of women in the US identified as or were diagnosed as disabled. The US Transgender Survey also found that 39% of transgender participants had at least one disability, compared to 15% of the general population. But to fully understand the connections between these identities, it’s important to consider how societal gender roles affect, and are affected by, the experience of disability (Slayter & Johnson, 2023).

    Society tells us how women and men are supposed to look and behave. However, these complicated societal rules of gender expression and sexuality become even more complicated by the daily requirements of disability. Femininity isn’t the only personality trait that’s affected by these requirements; masculinity is as well. While masculinity is culturally associated with strength and dominance, disability is often associated with weakness, submission, and inability (Slayter & Johnson, 2023). These cultural assumptions simultaneously demean masculinity, femininity, and the entire disability community.

    To properly understand how these assumptions affect physical, psychosocial, and political outcomes, it’s important to consider how coexisting minority identities add to the harm already caused by the stigma of disability. Stereotypes like the “angry black woman” and the “sissy gay boy” are good examples.  They are clear markers of difference that reinforce othering and contribute directly to harmful social constructs (Slayter & Johnson, 2023).

    A 2017 UK survey actually backed this up with concrete data. The survey showed that 34% of disabled LGBTQ+ adults had experienced inappropriate curiosity from staff, 20% had experienced unequal treatment, 15% had been outted in front of others without their consent, 8% had been pressured to change or suppress their LGBTQ+ identity, and 33% had seen a lack of understanding of LGBTQ+ health needs. Disabled transgender adults were also significantly more likely to have faced discrimination when accessing mental health centers, rape crisis centers, domestic violence shelters, and drug treatment programs. This discrimination was the most pronounced among those with learning disabilities, multiple disabilities, and those with Latino heritage (Green et al., 2023).

    Dating also adds another layer of complexity. Disabled LGBTQ+ women are significantly more likely to have a transgender partner and more likely to be single than their able-bodyminded counterparts. Research has shown that transgender people are around 1.7 times more likely to have experienced domestic violence than cisgender people, and in the US, 61% of disabled transgender adults have experienced some form of financial, physical, or emotional abuse. The wide range of disabilities and LGBTQ+ identities has limited the scope of data, however. So more studies are definitely needed on this subject. That said, many LGBTQ+ people with disabilities can benefit from dating within the community, as a sense of understanding and belonging is already present (Green et al., 2023).

    References

    Green, A.K., Gomes, R.S.M., Heinze, N., Kempapidis, T. (2023). Queer and Disabled: Exploring the experiences of people who identify as LGBT and live with disabilities. MDPI.com. https://www.mdpi.com/2673-7272/4/1/4

    Slayter, E., & Johnson, L. (2023). Social Work Practice and Disability Communities: An intersextional anti-oppressive approach — Chapter 7. Salem State University. ROTEL Project. https://pressbooks.salemstate.edu/disabilitysocialwork/chapter/chapter-7-gender-gender-identity-and-gender-expression/

  • Sexuality, Gender Identity, and Disability, Part 2

    Sexuality, Gender Identity, and Disability, Part 2

    Psychology & Healthcare

    According to the Gay, Lesbian, and Straight Education Network (GLSEN), gender is “a set of cultural identities, expressions, and roles… assigned to people, based upon the interpretation of their bodies.” This means that while a person’s sex is male, female, or intersex, their gender can be male, female, neither, or both. Because gender is a social construction, gender can be rejected or modified. It may also be the same as a person’s sex assigned at birth (SAAB), known as cisgender, or different from it, known as transgender (Slayter & Johnson, 2023).

    Further, a person’s gender identity may also differ from their gender expression, the intentional presentation of gender identity. Some people, like myself, identify as non-binary, a gender identity that exists somewhere between or outside of the male-female gender binary. Some other, related terms and subgroups include genderqueer, agender, and bigender (Slayter & Johnson, 2023). But these only scratch the surface.

    The discrimination, judgment, and stigma that stem from ignorance can easily discourage LGBTQ+ people with disabilities from disclosing their identities to medical professionals. A well-documented pattern across many minority groups shows that patients who are believed to be exaggerating or inventing symptoms are far less likely to disclose in the first place. When disabled LGBTQ+ patients do disclose and are met with misjudgments and assumptions, their confidence in healthcare in general is further eroded, limiting their ability to understand and advocate for their own bodies. Health literature actually confirms that a disproportionate number of LGBTQ+ people with disabilities, particularly those with ASD, have unmet healthcare needs, inadequate support networks, and documented cases of refused medical services (Mulcahy et al., 2024).

    One study drawing on qualitative data from 197 LGBTQ+ US participants with varying disabilities showed that 72.2% had avoided talking about their gender identity and/or sexuality with healthcare providers, and 9.8% never disclosed their LGBTQ+ identities at all. More research is definitely needed to identify potential causes behind these high rates of negative experiences. Though contributing factors are likely related to a lack of healthcare provider understanding and the all too common desexualization of disabled people (Mulcahy et al., 2024).

    In addition to these healthcare barriers, people with disabilities often have to contend with inaccessible transportation, limited or denied insurance, mobility challenges, high care costs, and more. Many LGBTQ+ people face their own barriers in employment, housing, healthcare, and legislation. However, LGBTQ+ people with disabilities frequently navigate all of these barriers simultaneously. Study participants have also reported lower overall health status and increased physical and mental symptoms. For those who identify as gender diverse, wholly unaddressed healthcare needs are also a major concern (Mulcahy et al., 2024). 

    In the 20th century alone, medical responses to disclosure included public shaming, coerced therapy, institutionalization, and lobotomies. Some minority groups responded to these feigned solutions by opening clinics. The Black Panthers’ Sickle Cell Anemia clinics and independent LGBTQ+ friendly services like the Haight Ashbury Medical Clinics are notable examples. Countless protests have also been mounted against the inclusion of homosexuality and gender identity disorder in the DSM, Medicaid funding cuts, threats to the Affordable Care Act, and other important causes (Health Right 360, 2026; American Psychiatric Association, 2025; Mulcahy et al., 2024).

    Concepts like crip theory, queer crip theory, and critical disability studies help explain how LGBTQ+ people are often perceived as inherently disabled and disabled people are often seen as inherently LGBTQ+ or asexual. However, the idea that both identities can coexist is rarely considered. In fact, the term crip has historically been used to stigmatize disabled people. Combined with the misconception that disabled people experience time and space differently than “able-bodyminded” people, and with Descartes’ idea that the body and mind can be experienced separately, these ideas likely laid the groundwork for crip theory (Mulcahy et al., 2024; Critical Disability Studies Collective, 2026).

    The largely unacknowledged intersection of LGBTQ+ identity and disability, and the resulting empathy gap, is likely a major contributing factor to patients regularly withholding parts of their identities. LGBTQ+ people with disabilities are routinely treated as though they have no specific sexuality or gender identity, even in medical settings. In some cases, they are even told outright that their disability makes a differing sexuality or gender identity impossible, a concerning conflation of causation and correlation. Society clearly needs to improve not only accessibility but also education on disability, sexuality, and gender identity (Mulcahy et al., 2024).

    For all these reasons, and the additional financial insecurity many LGBTQ+ people with disabilities face, supportive family, friends, and community are especially important. For those without a readily available support system, support groups and similar settings can provide information, emotional support, and rehabilitation resources. However, many support centers are only equipped to serve specific types of conditions or LGBTQ+ groups. In those cases, coming out socially and/or online may be a more manageable first step. Informal online support may help fill gaps left by formal support systems and unsupportive family, and can reduce social isolation in the process. All too often, others “see the disability and not the person,” dismissing a disabled person’s sexuality entirely, or even fetishizing their disability. While some disabled people may not object to this, it’s usually seen as dehumanizing. Often, all that’s needed is a little creativity, experimentation, and communication (Green et al., 2023).

    References

    American Psychiatric Association (2025). Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (5th ed.). Psychiatry Online. https://psychiatryonline.org/dsm

    Health Right 360 (2026). Our Story. Health Right 360. https://www.healthright360.org/about/our-story/

    Mulcahy, A., Batza, K., Goddard, K., McMaughan, D.J., Kurth, N.K., Streed, C.G., Wallisch, A.M., Hall, J.P. (2024). Experiences of patients with disabilities and sexual or gender minority status during healthcare interactions. National Library of Medicine. https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC11404532/

    Slayter, E., & Johnson, L. (2023). Social Work Practice and Disability Communities: An intersextional anti-oppressive approach — Chapter 7. Salem State University. ROTEL Project. https://pressbooks.salemstate.edu/disabilitysocialwork/chapter/chapter-7-gender-gender-identity-and-gender-expression/

    Critical Disability Studies Collective (2026). Terminology. University of Minnesota. https://cdsc.umn.edu/cds/terms

    Green, A.K., Gomes, R.S.M., Heinze, N., Kempapidis, T. (2023). Queer and Disabled: Exploring the experiences of people who identify as LGBT and live with disabilities. MDPI.com. https://www.mdpi.com/2673-7272/4/1/4

  • Sexuality, Gender Identity, and Disability, Part 1

    Sexuality, Gender Identity, and Disability, Part 1

    Education

    Society often assumes that having a disability automatically means an individual either can’t or doesn’t have sex. Because of this, disabled people are often given inadequate sexual health resources and education. Data from the Centers for Disease Control (CDC) shows that around 22% of American adults have some form of disability. CDC data from 2015 also shows that 41% of high schoolers report being sexually active, often without using protection. Around 10 million new cases of sexually transmitted infections (STIs) were found in people 15 to 24 years old, and around 22% of new HIV diagnoses occurred in people 13 to 24 years old (Clarke, 2017).

    Of course, these are only the cases reported to the CDC. There’s also the question of why any of this is happening in the first place. Some of it comes down to simple teenage disregard for safety. But the societal disregard of sexuality in the disabled community, and the resulting lack of education, has to be taken into account. Accommodations such as ASL interpreters, alternative formatting, simplified language, and physical accommodations can address most of these barriers. In other words, barriers shouldn’t be used as an excuse to avoid proper education; they should be seen as a call for proper accommodations (Clarke, 2017).

    People with intellectual and developmental disabilities (IDDs), a category of cognitive disabilities, have increasingly influenced research on the connections between sexuality, gender identity, and disability. However, this influence has not reduced the level of layered discrimination, sexual abuse, and exploitation that can lead to mental health issues. Research from the Human Rights Campaign (HRC) has also shown that 36% of LGBTQ+ adults, and 52% of transgender adults specifically, also identify as disabled, with cognitive disabilities being the most common category of disability. Unfortunately, much of the research concerning disabled LGBTQ+ people focuses solely on the perspectives of caretakers and medical professionals. Fortunately, there’s a growing push to prioritize the anonymity of those with disabilities and to increase community-engaged research (CER) (Kammes, n.d.).

    In general, disabled people tend to have lower levels of education and employment, largely because of inadequate support and teaching. Sex education is often lacking for disabled students, and special education needs are often evaluated late or inadequately supported. Those who leave school early because of disability often struggle to find employment and the benefits that come with it. Students also often lack education on LGBTQ+ issues, and around a fifth of LGBTQ+ students are outed and/or harassed. However, most of these cases go unreported because they’re seen as “not serious enough”, a pattern that can lead students to believe that reporting won’t change anything (Green et al., 2023).

    To add to this, disabled LGBTQ+ students often miss out on education because of compounded fear: being harassed, assaulted, or expelled, with their disability making it harder for them to do anything about it. Compared to those without disabilities, disabled LGBTQ+ women are also significantly less likely to find full-time work and more likely to be unable to complete the work they do find. Disabled transgender adults are also more likely to be unemployed, let go from a job, experience employment discrimination, and fear discrimination if they quit. In fact, surveys have shown that gender identity was the most common reason given for being denied promotion, fired, or not hired in the first place. Annual household income was also found to be significantly higher in homes without disabilities than in those with one or more disability (Green et al., 2023).

    References

    Clarke, T. (2017). Disability Rights and Sexual Health. AMCHP. https://amchp.org/2017/12/15/disability-rights-and-sexual-health/

    Green, A.K., Gomes, R.S.M., Heinze, N., Kempapidis, T. (2023). Queer and Disabled: Exploring the experiences of people who identify as LGBT and live with disabilities. MDPI.com. https://www.mdpi.com/2673-7272/4/1/4

    Kammes, R. (n.d.). Belonging and Community: Trends in issues relating to sexuality and gender identity for people with disabilities. Institute on Community Integration, University of Minnesota. https://publications.ici.umn.edu/impact/36-2/belonging-and-community

  • Silver Linings — Assistive Technology

    Silver Linings — Assistive Technology

    FocusMate

    FocusMate is a virtual body doubling service, but let me back up. Body doubling is essentially parallel play for everyday tasks and chores. Many neurodiverse people, especially those with ADHD, have a hard time staying focused when alone, but work far more efficiently when someone else is there holding them accountable. Like most people, I sought this out for most of my life and only recently learned the name for it.

    Kids doing homework while a parent works on something nearby and periodically checks; that’s body doubling. Working on your laptop at a library or café while others do the same; also, body doubling. In behavioral health, this is often described as modeled behavior. FocusMate applies this same concept through video calls and builds the Pomodoro Technique into its structure: a method traditionally using cycles of 25-minute bursts of focused work with 5-minute breaks in between, designed to boost productivity and prevent burnout.

    FocusMate’s pricing is also straightforward and reasonable. Their free plan allows users up to three sessions a week at no charge. Their Plus plan offers unlimited weekly sessions for $8 per month (billed annually) or $12 per month (billed monthly). Businesses can also sign up for $5 per user per month for teams of 10 or more, with a $50 monthly minimum.

    The site itself has a detailed, fully cited article on the science behind their method, along with an FAQ page and a page with detailed guidance on what users can do during sessions. Sessions can be prescheduled or started within minutes of logging in. To start a session, a user selects a length of time (25, 50, or 75 minutes), a task mode (Desk, Moving, or Anything), and whether they’d like to work in Quiet Mode. I personally prefer 50-minute sessions on the Anything task mode without setting Quiet Mode. I then introduce myself and my task, mute my microphone, and start working.

    My preferred settings let me stay focused on my task and listen to my Instrumental Study playlist with someone else helping to hold me accountable. What a difference! When I first heard about FocusMate, I assumed it was just another app for sensitive tech bros. But it has genuinely helped me improve my productivity, and I’m happy to be proven wrong by science.

    References

    Focusmate Inc. (2026). How It Works. FocusMate.com. https://www.focusmate.com/how-it-works/

    Health Essentials (2025). What is Body Doubling and Can It Help with ADHD?. Cleveland Clinic. https://health.clevelandclinic.org/body-doubling-for-adhd

  • Silver Linings — Stress & Anxiety Aids

    Silver Linings — Stress & Anxiety Aids

    The Woobles

    A few years ago, a therapist I was seeing suggested that I try to take up an offline hobby. Research has backed this up. Hobbies can help with the symptoms of stress, depression, and anxiety in several ways. Some can help us process emotions and ground us in the present. Others can create a sense of progress through small wins, which can help us strengthen our identities and build connections. They can also help us with routines and healthy habits. In fact, 45 minutes of working on visual art can reduce cortisol levels in 75% of people. Journaling can bring clarity in tough situations, and gardening can help ease depression (MHA, 2026).

    There were plenty of hobby options to choose from. I could even take up people-watching in the park, using snippets of overheard conversations as creative writing prompts. But fiber arts were starting their comeback, and I knew that my mom and sister both knew how to knit and crochet. Naturally, I wanted to learn too, but I didn’t want to take up their time. YouTube had some decent videos, but most were aimed at experienced crocheters.

    Then I saw an ad for The Woobles. That was it! Something felt perfectly suited to a detail-oriented, routine-obsessed mind like mine. I found the kit I wanted and got started. I started with the easy Woobles originals and quickly filled my wish list with favorites. They now offer a wide and growing range of options, including their original patterns. If you’re looking for something nerdy or fantastical, there are now crochet collaborations with franchises ranging from Peanuts and Hello Kitty to The Lord of the Rings and Harry Potter. Every kit comes with all the materials you’ll need, including a QR code for the video instructions, and the company’s YouTube channel has other helpful content (The Woobles, 2026). I can’t recommend The Woobles enough!

    References

    The Woobles (2026). Billy the Unicorn Crochet Kit. The Woobles. https://thewoobles.com/products/unicorn-crochet-kit?_pos=2&_psq=billy&_ss=e&_v=1.0

    MHA (2026). Why Hobbies Are Good for Your Mental Health. Mental Health America. https://mhanational.org/resources/why-hobbies-are-good-for-your-mental-health/

  • Silver Linings – Sensory & Figet Toys for Neurodivergent Adults

    Silver Linings – Sensory & Figet Toys for Neurodivergent Adults

    As I briefly touched on in my first posts, sensory tools can make a big difference for those of us with chronic anxiety and other neurodivergent conditions. For many on the autism spectrum, such as myself, stimming is almost as essential as eating. Sure, we can delay, minimize, and modify our stims, but it’s best for everyone when we find a safe outlet that meets our stimming needs. This is where sensory and fidget toys can be so beneficial, and you don’t even have to be neurodivergent to see these benefits.

    Little Ouchies

    Like many autistic adults, I have unconsciously relied on something called pain stimming for most of my life. Pain stimming refers to any number of self-stimulatory behaviors that produce low-grade pain or mild discomfort as a way of self-regulating overwhelming emotions. This can include skin picking, nail biting, hair pulling, digging fingernails into one’s own skin, or even hitting oneself. Pain stimming is not inherently harmful, but it can become so when the stimming escalates. Often, the best solution is not to try to stop the behaviors entirely, but rather to redirect them (The Sensory Store, 2025).

    When I start to feel overwhelmed or completely out of control of a situation, I need to ground myself. Without my fidget toys, I dig my nails into my arm or bite my lip or tongue until I feel a painful sensation that I can control. When I was younger, I would hit myself on the shoulder, leg, or head. This can get dangerous for anyone when they are unable to self-regulate. This is exactly why I have my Little Ouchies pain stim spinner. The spikes on its surface let me safely experience a small, controlled pain sensation, while the spinner allows me to fidget in place when I need to move (Little Ouchies, 2025). If you’re interested in buying one for yourself or a loved one, please find the link in my references below.

    References

    Little Ouchies (2025). What is Pain Stimming? A Guide to Neurodivergent Sensory Tools & Self-Regulation. Little Ouchies. https://littleouchies.com/blogs/news/what-is-pain-stimming-a-guide-to-neurodivergent-sensory-tools-self-regulation

    The Sensory Store (2025). Pain Stimming and Harm Reduction Supports. The Sensory Store. https://www.sensorystore.co.nz/blogs/news/pain-stimming-and-harm-reduction-supports

  • Silver Linings

    Silver Linings

    I started my blog with research posts discussing specific issues that members of the disability community face regularly. I research each topic thoroughly and provide references at the end for anyone who wants to explore further. However, I felt there was more I could do for holistically-minded members of the disability community, like myself. So, from time to time, I’ll be posting what I like to call Silver Linings.

    Silver Linings posts will include reviews of products, services, and businesses, along with the occasional interview, all focused on things that can help to brighten your day. I welcome suggestions on products, places, goods, and services worth looking into. I love hearing from other members of this community about what has helped you. I’m only one person with my own experiences, and I firmly believe that a community benefits most when we work together. After all, who better to vouch for a product or service than real people who really use it?

    If you’d like to contribute or just send me a message, feel free to comment below or email me at UnicornRootsHolistic@gmail.com. And as I like to say: eat chocolate, pet puppies, and have a great day!